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Is Your Perspective Written in Stone?

It seems when we are in conflict that we often tend to develop and hold onto our perspective as though it’s absolute – written in stone as it were. The more entrenched we become – due to the emotional attachment to our views and upset we are experiencing by the other person and their views – the more we reactive we are. And, at these times, we are  less inclined to listen, want to listen, and consider possibilities that might serve the outcome, the relationship and us better.

It’s challenging, at these times, to stand back – to gain distance – and lighten the hold on our rightness. This  week’s Conflict Mastery Quest(ions) blog invites you to do that regarding a dispute you are experiencing that is not resolving.

  • What is the dispute about?
  • What perspective do you have that you realize you are strongly holding onto?
  • What is the other person’s perspective that they are holding onto?
  • What makes your perspective one that is hard for you to soften?
  • What makes the other person’s one that is hard for them to soften?
  • If your view of how to resolve things is not written in stone what other possibilities are there for a resolution of the issues?
  • How might that or those work for you (your answer your the previous question)?
  • How might that or those possibilities work for the other person?
  • Knowing where the other person is coming from and that nothing is really written in stone, what might you say that they would consider as a possible way (or ways) to move forward?
  • What would you want to hear from them that would inspire you to consider another way or other ways to do so?
  • What else occurs to you as you consider these questions?
  • What insights do you have?

#conflict management

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