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Rage is a Four-Letter Word

Rage is a word that describes a strong emotion that sometimes evolves when we are in conflict. It is not necessarily an immediate reaction. Rather, it is one that often signals an escalation of feelings such as anger and hurt about a person and/or an issue. The build-up erupts into a state of being furious, incensed, and out of control of our words, thoughts, and emotions.

This week’s blog considers that rage, like some other ‘four-letter words’ stated fiercely, is an extreme reaction. The evolution of emotions that becomes rage often seems to be a consequence of continuing disagreement in which issues that are important to us are not being resolved. This is usually accompanied by a sense that our needs, hopes, and expectations are not going to be met. I also think rage arises when we perceive and fear that our deep-felt beliefs, values, and feelings are being ignored.

This week’s ConflictMastery™ Quest(ions) blog invites you to consider a time when you became enraged in conflict or experienced someone else’s rage.

  • Generally, how do you describe what happens to you when you become enraged?
  • What are the specific feelings you are experiencing at these times?
  • Considering a specific incident when you became enraged, how do you describe your reaction at that particular time?
  • What was the result of your reaction – for you? The other person?
  • What was clear to you about what led to your reaction? What wasn’t clear?
  • How did the other person react to your rage?
  • When you have experienced another person’s rage at you, how did you react internally? Externally?
  • In that case, what did you understand about the other person or the situation that you hadn’t before she or he raged at you? What became less clear?
  • If you want to change a rage reaction (your own) from erupting in the future, what may you do differently?
  • What may you do differently in the future in response to someone who reacts to you in rage?

What other ConflictMastery™ Quest(ions) may you add here?

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