Get Over Yourself
There are times when we are in a conversation with another person that we take the ‘high road’. This shows up in a number of ways and today’s blog looks at the ill effects such an approach can have.
We may appear arrogant and patronizing at these times, and this attitude can be irritating to the point of triggering the other person and heightening the tension. We may get entrenched in the ‘rightness’ of our perspective – leaving little to no room for open dialogue. I think it is this sort of approach that leads people to say or want to say in response, “get over yourself”.
Since it is commonly the case that acting in the ways described above either shuts others down or escalates matters, it helps to consider when to “get over ourselves”. Instead of taking high roads and low roads, it may help instead to consider how to walk on the same road with the other person in an effort to reconcile differences.
Here are some ConflictMastery™ Quest(ions) on this topic. It is suggested you bring to mind one or two times when you found yourself sounding or becoming self-righteous or patronizing or however else you may describe an approach that reflects the sort of attitude described in this blog. Think, too, of times when you have observed others demonstrate this.
- What is your meaning of the phrase “get over yourself”?
- Under what circumstances may you use or think the expression “get over yourself” about someone’s actions, attitude, etc.?
- What do you feel about the person at these times?
- Considering a situation when you used or wanted to use this expression, what do you think that person needed to get over?
- How would you like her or him to have been instead?
- Under what circumstances may you do or say something that leads someone to say or think “get over yourself” about you?
- Considering a specific situation when someone said something such as this statement to you, what may she or he thought you needed to get over at that time?
- How does it impact you to hear someone direct expressions such as “get over yourself” to you?
- In the future when you hear yourself sounding like someone who needs to get over yourself, what may you say or do instead?
- How may you respond in a conflict masterful way when you begin to feel you want to say “get over yourself” to someone else?
What other ConflictMastery™ Quest(ions) may you add here?
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